With Viagra such a hit, Pfizer is bringing forth a whole line of drugs

oriented towards improving the performance of men in today's society....

DIRECTRA - a dose of this drug given to men before leaving on car

trips caused 72 percent of them to stop and ask directions when

they got lost, compared to a control group of 0.2 percent.

PROJECTRA - Men given this experimental new drug were far more

likely to actually finish a household repair project before starting a

new one.

CHILDAGRA - Men taking this drug reported a sudden, over-whelming

urge to perform more child-care tasks - especially cleaning up spills

and "little accidents."

COMPLIMENTRA - In clinical trials, 82 percent of middle-aged men

administered this drug noticed that their wives had a new

hairstyle. Currently being tested to see if its effects extend to

noticing new clothing.

BUYAGRA - Married and otherwise attached men reported a sudden

urge to buy their sweeties expensive jewelry and gifts after talking

this drug for only two days. Still to be seen: whether the drug can be

continued for a period longer than your favorites store's return

limit.

NEGA-VIAGRA - Has the exact opposite effect of Viagra. Currently

undergoing clinical trials on sitting U.S. presidents.

NEGA-SPORTAGRA - This drug had the strange effect of making men

want to turn off televised sports and actually converse with other

family members.

FLATULAGRA - This complex drug converts men's noxious intestinal

gases back into food solids. Special bonus: Dosage can be doubled

for long car rides.

FLYAGRA - This drug has been showing great promise in treating men

with O.F.D. (Open Fly Disorder). Expecially useful for men on Viagra.

PRYAGRA - About to fail its clinical trial, this drug gave men in

the test group an irresistible urge to dig into the personal affairs

of other people. Note: Apparent over-dose turned three test subjects

into "special prosecutors."

LIAGRA - This drug causes men to be less than truthful when being

asked about their sexual affairs. Will be available Regular, Grand

Jury and Presidential Strength versions.